Seattle grunge-punk trio Wild Powwers’s latest music video, “Decades,” is a glimpse into the dark and naggingly persistent, yet unremarkable, nature of depression.
The “Decades” video, by Ron Harrell, shuttles through days passing by, framing a slideshow of intimate moments: in bed, on the couch, tossing and turning with unrest. The montage builds a sense of stagnancy, an ode to lost time as Lara Hilgemann sings, “Is that what you wanted to hear, lying facedown on your couch? / Trying to pick up your feet, but you just can’t get out.” Running at just over four minutes, the song captures the eternity of days (or, rather, decades) that seem to slip through your fingers in the midst of depression.
The track plays to the softer side of the band’s usual grimy rock sound, opening with bright instrumentation: upbeat, pulsing drums and bass by Lupe Flores and Jordan Gomes, respectively. This is matched with glimmering guitar and soft vocalization from Hilgemann on viscerally aching melancholy sentiments like, “Ain’t it so strange / Passing mirrors in the hall / And you look away / Cause you can’t stand your sight at all.”
As the video conveys a growing restlessness with more cuts and shorter shots, the track bursts into heavy guitar chords, wildfire drumming, and Hilgemann’s signature yelling. The lyrics shift from “Is that what you wanted” to “Is that how you wanna act, saying stupid shit you just can’t take back?” The success of this track exists in the tension between the light, airy beginning and the cannonball into big feelings that cannot be contained — a return to the tenacious and forceful sound of Wild Powwers’s previous work.
In an interview, Hilgemann told KEXP, “You tell yourself, ‘This too shall pass. Things get better.’ And then a small voice tells you, ‘And then that too passes, and you’ll come right back to how you feel now.’ It’s an Ouroboros. But is this what you want? Is this what you want to feel everyday? Does it get to win? Can you seek the help you need? The hardest thing to accept is that you are worth the help you need, and it’s OK to ask for it.”
A sonic emblem of the Ouroboros, “Decades” captures the ebb and flow of depression in its light and heavy variations. This track can’t give you lost decades back — but is an affirming tribute to the cycle of depression for those of us who know it well. When I get too in my head about all the time I’ve lost to depression and the phases of my eating disorder, tracks like “Decades” bring me out of that gnawing self-hate and help me remember so many of us struggle with mental health.
Other times, I turn to my two favorite Billy Joel life lessons: 1. “Take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile / It’s alright, you can afford to lose a day or two” and 2. “But don’t you know that only fools are satisfied?” So if you’re kicking yourself while you’re down because days are passing you by, give “Decades” a listen. It’s certainly not a cure, but I do feel a little less alone with Wild Powwers (and Billy Joel) on my side.
“Decades” is the third single released off Wild Powwers’s upcoming LP, What You Wanted. The LP is out April 23 on Nadine Records, with production by Sam Bell and mastering by Ed Brooks. You can listen to the first two singles, “…Sucks” and “Bone Throw,” as well as “Decades,” on Bandcamp now.
P.S. The Tractor Tavern has just opened an outdoor bar with Situ Tacos brought to you by Lupe Flores. They’re open Thursday through Saturday from 5 – 9 p.m. and Sunday from 11 a.m. – 5 p.m.
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